Everything is Cancelled (or Postponed)!
We all recognise that 2020 was a challenging year as we grappled with the idea of a global pandemic. However, it seems as though 2021 has been just as challenging, if not more so, given the constant stop and start of routine we have experienced.
In time of cancelled events and unpredictability, it feels as though it is almost easier not to plan anything than to deal with the constant postponement of events. It’s not just the cancellation of big events either, the cancellation of smaller (perhaps seemingly insignificant) events can cause huge upset and anguish, especially for our kids.
Coping with disappointment from these cancelled life events is no small feat for us as adults, let alone our children. So it is important that we equip them with the tools they need to be able to cope with these moments of disappointment and build resilience for the future.
Just because we are used to events being cancelled does not mean we can’t allow ourselves the time to mourn missed life events. We have all been deeply affected by the challenges and emotions that have come with the past 18 months and we need to make a conscious effort to find ways to process these emotions.
Maintain a Routine
Keep a daily routine that is as close to normal as possible. Even getting up and getting dressed for work and school can provide the energy to get through another day working or learning from home. Find activities you enjoy and allow yourself the time to do them. Make sure everyone is getting enough sleep and eating well.
Celebrate Life
Life seems to continue despite the continual lockdowns. Birthdays still come and major milestones continue to occur all around us – so celebrate anyway! Consider making a list of the events that have been missed during lockdown and start planning a big celebration for when restrictions are eased. Use the amazing tool of technology to celebrate life events with loved ones. This past weekend we celebrated my dad’s birthday over Facetime and my sister gave us a virtual tour of the nursery she has been busily setting up for her new arrival. As much as I would have loved to do all this in person, I am so thankful that we could still spend time celebrating these life events as a family.
Write a Gratitude List
More and more research is showing the benefits of practicing gratitude for our own mental health. Write a list of things you are thankful for. You might even like to end each day writing 3 things you are grateful for as a family. Write letters of thanks to those around you. Thank a health care worker, a teacher, a family member or someone else who you are grateful!
Seek Support
Reach out to loved ones over the phone or Facetime and Zoom to help you stay connected to those most important to you. If you or your child are struggling with Remote Learning, get in touch with your child’s Homeroom teacher or the Wellbeing staff at school. We are here to help! If you are finding things are just too overwhelming and you’re not sure if you can cope, consider reaching out to a psychologist or a support service such as Beyond Blue or Lifeline. There is no shame in asking for help!
Have Hope
Remind yourself this is not permanent – every though it may feel like the whole world has stopped, remember that this will pass. Just like last year, things will open back up again and life will return to some sense of normality.
Amidst all of this, it’s important to recognise that anxiety and disappointment are ok. Missing on life events is incredibly disappointing. The most effective way to deal with disappointment is to let yourself feel it. Processing these feelings will look different for everyone. What is important is that you do what feels right to you.